EleVate Yourself

Making Others Watch Your Kids

This story about kids learning to count change (at the expense of others) is awesome.

When in line with five other really tired, hungry people behind you, that is SO not the time to teach your kids economics.

All I wanted was my pizza.

The lady in front of me wanted to assure that her kids get that extra fiddy cents an hour when landing a job, all because they can count.

She ordered her pizza and I sighed in relief. It took her five minutes to decide on the type of crust. There have been the same three types since the 1960's, but, please, take your time.

"Oh, my daughter wants a slushee." She gazed down at the youngest. "Go ahead, Megan."

Shit.

Shit shit shit.

"I want a slushee. A pink one," Megan declared. The elderly cashier looked positively orgasmic with delight. Well, roll me in sugar and call me cookie, isn't that fucking precious.

"That will be ONE DOLLAR, AND EIGHTEEN CENTS!" the cashier hollered. Because we all know that if you don't understand the math? Holler. No speaka dee English? Holler. If Crystal has a migraine? Holler.

"Ok." Megan whipped out her Hello Kitty coin purse and with her tongue poking out, methodically began counting out pennies.
Sweet bleeding Abraham, someone fucking gut me and cover me in bleach. It will be less painful.

"And eighteen cents!" Megan declared after what seemed like an hour. The entire line behind her breathed a collective sigh of relief.

As I inched forward, using that "breathe down your neck so you'll move faster" mentality, the mother spoke.

"Now, your turn, April."

See the rest at the interestingly named not-a-mommy-blog ("My kids aren't perfect & I cuss a lot. ") Boobs, Injuries & Dr. Pepper

posted by D.J. EleVate @ 10:42 AM